


Relationships That Will Last a Lifetime

by otakudrawinggg, Potassiumx19



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Amnesia, Fluff, Hospitals, Kags and hinata are precious kitties, Light Angst, M/M, Misunderstandings, Oikawa is an overprotective mum, Panic Attacks, READ FOR THE PRECIOUS KAGEHINA CATS, Slow Burn, Smut, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, Well my attempt at it anyways, bwahahahahahaha, he needs to be sheltered and protected, kenma is also a bit of a tsun too in this, kenma works at a convenience store, mummy oikawa, precious cinnamon roll kenma, slight stalker kuro-at the start :'), woops was that a sprinkle of angst
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-09-30
Updated: 2018-05-29
Packaged: 2019-01-07 05:38:34
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 9,548
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12226854
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/otakudrawinggg/pseuds/otakudrawinggg, https://archiveofourown.org/users/Potassiumx19/pseuds/Potassiumx19
Summary: Precious cinnamon roll meets shady black-spiked haired man. Said shady man falls in love with said cinnamon roll and i really suck at descriptions!!! Please read :")





	1. First meetings leave lasting impressions (aka the stalking incident ;) )

Why is that guy with serious bedhead always following me? Kenma thought, looking up from his PSP and turning to eye the mysterious bedheaded stranger behind him. What did the stranger want with him? Had he done something to offend him without realising? Thoughts like these raced through his mind in the instant he faced the stranger. The stranger flinched at the gamer's cold glare, causing him to bump into pole he was hiding behind. Although Kenma was worried about how closely the stranger had been observing him, he could't suppress the small smirk that appeared across his face (he'd never seen anyone walk into a pole like that in real life, it was the sort of thing that only happened in movies).  
  
The golden eyed boy could have sworn he saw the stranger's face turn a slight shade of red but maybe he was just imagining things, turning his attention back to the game console in his hands. That guy seems pretty sketchy, I mean just look at that hair. Plus he was watching me so closely that he didn't notice the pole right in front of him.  
  
This was the fifth day that Kenma had noticed he was being followed on his way home. He'd thought about calling the cops but decided against it, he didn't want to cause problems for others, he didn't want to bring more attention to himself. He didn't want to be asked an array of questions down at a police station.  
  
The pressure would be too much.  
  
He'd notice that the man stopped following him on the same street each day, a few streets before his. The stranger must have lived in the area and maybe he was following Kenma to find a quicker route home, well that's what he had hoped for. Please let that be the reason.  
  
He had assumed that today would be no different, the stranger would stop following him and he could walk home with one less worry, one less thought that he'd obsess over on his way home. However when Kenma walked passed the street, the stranger was still following him.  
  
This wasn't supposed to happen. The stranger was supposed to turn down that street. Maybe Kenma really had offended him. Was it because he looked at him? Was he angry because he walked into that pole?  
  
Kenma felt around his pants pocket making sure that he had his phone on him. He quickened his pace, saving his game and shoving his PSP into his bag so he wouldn't damage it if he had to run.  
  
Heavy footsteps could be heard from behind, growing faster and heavier by the second. Was the stranger trying to catch him. Oh, crap what if he is a stalker? Kenma panicked what would he do to me if he caught me? No, I can't let him catch me. Kenma bit his bottom lip and began sprinting as fast as he could.  
  
The heavy footsteps didn't stop, they kept coming closer and closer. Kenma felt his chest grow tight. The thought of being caught by the stranger terrified him. His vision began to cloud over with white flecks and the next thing he knew he was tumbling to the ground only to be stopped by a strong pull on his wrist. Kenma squeezed his eyes shut, hoping it would make the situation less scary if he couldn't see his attacker's face. He was pulled into a strong embrace.  
  
"Let go of me you STALKER! Kenma yelled, voice cracking on the word stalker. He squirmed in the stranger's grasp. "I'll call the cops!" He threatened, words shaky.  
  
He didn't expect the strong arms to let him go as easily as they did. Kenma opened his eyes to see the stranger standing about a meter in away from him.  
  
"Woah now, no need to do that." The stranger appealed, arms outstretched.  
  
Kenma took on a defensive stance turning slightly to the side and somewhat raising his shoulders in an attempt to cover his face from his attacker. He noted the stranger's appearance. He was tall, he must be over six foot. His hair was a sleek jet-black colour and despite it looking like he just woke up, Kenma found it sort of appealing. The stranger had narrow hazel coloured eyes.  
  
"Sorry if I scared you there," the stranger said slightly chuckling to himself while awkwardly rubbing the back of his neck.  
"I was on my way home and I noticed that you dropped this." The stranger said scratching underneath his eye with his left index finger.  
"I wasn't sure how to approach you and then you kinda started to run away from me, I didn't know what else to do." He chuckled again and held out his right hand, in it was a small cat charm.  
  
Huh? Why does he have that? It looks the same as the one on my PSP, Kenma thought. Immediately he flung his backpack in front of him and began rummaging around for his PSP mumbling 'where is it' over and over until the console was safely in his hands.  
  
"It's gone, when did it?" Kenma furrowed his eyebrows, that tightness back in his chest again. He hadn't noticed it had fallen off, normally he would have noticed. Did he not notice because he was more worried about being caught by the man in front of him? Was the man in front of him really just going to return his charm to him? He put his PSP back into his bag and then slung it onto his back and then looked up at the stranger. Their gaze met for a second before Kenma moved his eyes back to the cat charm in the stranger's hand.  
  
Kenma looked at it with uncertainty. Was it polite to ask if he could take it back? Was he allowed to just take it?  
  
"You know you can take it right? There's no need to burn a hole in my hand with your eyes," the stranger chuckled. Kenma looked up at him noticing the wide but awkward grin on his face.  
  
"T-thank…" Kenma murmured looking around nervously as he reached out for the charm which was quickly snatched away from his grasp.  
"H-hey! What are you doing? You said that I could take it..." Kenma stuttered, golden eyes glaring up at the taller man who just smirked back at him.  
  
"What did you say before? I didn't hear you properly." His eyes had a hint of playfulness in them that fit perfectly with the cheeky expression on the rest of his face.  
  
"You did hear me so give it back, you thief!" Kenma pouted as he stretched to try and reach the charm being held above the strangers head, standing on his toes.  
  
"First a stalker and now a thief?' The stranger laughed.  
"Aren't you just full of accusations towards me. I am neither of those which you accuse me of." He placed a hand over his heart. "I am simply a kind person who was trying to return a lost item."  
  
Kenma wondered if he was serious about being a kind person, or if he meant it as a joke.  
  
"Thank you." Kenma said lips forming into a pout. That was all he wanted right, a thank you and then he would return the charm. Kenma just wanted the charm back so he could finally go home. Aside from being scary, the guy was also annoying.  
  
The taller man didn't lower his arm. He raised an eyebrow.  
"Aaaaaaaand?"  
  
"Sorry for calling you a stalker and a thief…" Kenma said rolling his eyes. The taller boy held out the cat charm to Kenma who snatched it away. Kenma fumbled around in his bag again finding his PSP and reattaching the charm.  
  
The charm was back in it's rightful place and this put a small smile on Kenma's face. He felt less nervous when he knew that all of his belongings were back where they were supposed to be.  
  
"Kuroo."  
  
"What?" Kenma asked turning away from his bag and towards the boy standing by him, PSP in hand.  
  
"My name's Kuroo, what's yours?" Kuroo smiled tilting his head slightly.  
  
Why does he want my name? What does he want with me? Maybe I really did do something to offend him and now he's going to get all of his friends to come after me.  
  
The smile wasn't leaving Kuroo's face anytime soon. He gave Kenma a look of anticipation. Something about that look compelled Kenma to give out his name to the man.  
  
"K-Kozume Kenma" he replied. Not once did he make eye contact with Kuroo.  
  
"Kenma, huh." His bright smile dimmed a little and his eyes drooped slightly, he looked like he was in pain. Normally Kenma would have been angry or feel extremely uncomfortable being addressed by his first name by someone he barely knew, but he was too distracted by the expression on Kuroo's face to care. That sort of pained expression didn't belong on his face. The expression was quickly replaced with a scheming smile and cheeky eyes.  
  
"I was expecting your name to be 'Pudding Head' or something, you know, to match your interesting hairstyle," he chuckled to himself like he had just made the best joke in the world. (It wasn't) Kenma thought it was pretty lame to make fun of someones appearance. Plus if he had been any younger he may have even felt hurt by that joke, he'd always been the sensitive type.  
  
"Kuroo, that's not very funny you know." He shot daggers in the other's direction.  
" You said you live around here right?"  
  
"Yeah, just a couple streets back," Kuroo answered pointing over his shoulder back the way they'd come.  
  
"Well." Kenma began. "Why don't you go there and leave me alone already." He raised his eyebrows and pointed the same way the other boy had pointed. The other boys eyes seemed to drop slightly at that comment but instantly perked up again.  
  
"Okay, fine." He said. "I'll go, but you have to answer my question first." He pointed towards Kenma's PSP.  
"That charm, why did you want it back so bad? Is it that important to you?" He enquired.  
  
Kenma looked at the charm and back at Kuroo again.  
"I got it from someone, that's all." Kuroo's eyes lit up.  
  
"Ohoho oho, was it from a girl?" He questioned, poking Kenma's side with his elbow.  
  
Don't touch me so familiarly.  
  
Kenma felt heat creep across his cheeks.  
"I don't know… The only thing I know is that I got it from someone who was important to me in high school, I don't really remember much about that time…"  Kenma looked at the ground as he spoke. He could have sworn that Kuroo had moved closer to him, or maybe he was just imagining things again.  
"There I answered your question, now you have to leave me alone."  
  
Kuroo smiled his mischievous smile again. "Sure, sure I'll go now. Bye Kenma, I'll see you tomorrow." He called as he walked back the way they had come.  
  
"Yeah, yeah, bye." Kenma called back half heartedly. Wait did he say 'I'll see you tomorrow'?  
  
  
                                                ***  
  
  
Kenma rushed to the his front door, fishing around in his bag for his keys. He snagged them, opening the door and locking it behind him. He turned the door knob for good measure. There was no way in hell that Kenma would be leaving his door unlocked, especially not after today. He quickly discarded his shoes at the entrance and was greeted by a small ginger cat nuzzling it's way around his ankles.  
  
"Hey, at least let me get out of the entranceway first Shouyo," he yelled although the smile on his face contradicted his slightly angered tone. Shouyo meowed in response, running ahead of his owner. Kenma laughed, Shouyo's amount of energy would never cease to amaze him.   
  
The pudding haired boy went into his kitchen with his cat in tow and dropped his bag on the counter. He opened a wall cupboard and pulled out some wet cat food and some cat biscuits, which he then used to top up Shouyo's food bowl. The cat dug straight into his fresh food completely disregarding his owner's presence.  
  
"Wow, good to know I'm loved around here." Kenma joked as he picked up his bag and headed down the hallway to his room. His house was small but the rent was cheap so he didn't care. It's not like he had anyone that he would invite over anyway- except maybe Yachi from work. She had this calming nature about her, even though she was always panicking over the littlest of things.  
  
He worked part time at the convenience store just down the road, it was easy to commute from his house on days he had night shifts or on his way home from college on his afternoon shifts. Considering the amount of work involved in his job, the pay was relatively good. It was enough to make a living anyway. All he has to do is greet the customer, scan their items, place them in a bag and say goodbye. Sometimes he'd even ask if the customer wanted their meal warmed up- Simple. No unnecessary conversations needed.  
  
Kenma dumped his bag by the doorway to his room and sat down on the side of his bed. He stretched his arms over his head and let himself fall backwards onto the blankets, feet hanging off the bed. Today had been particularly draining for the boy, first he thought he had a stalker and second he was forced to converse with a complete stranger.  
  
Kuroo… He was a weird one, but I don't think he's a bad guy, Kenma couldn't help thinking. But I won't be disappointed if I never see him again. There was a dip in the mattress to his left and a faint purr.  
  
Shouyo was paying his owner a visit, making up for the lack of affection he showed earlier. He nuzzled the boy's face before curling into a ball beside his head.  
  
"Ah, so you do love me?" Kenma breathed, patting the ginger cat with the back of his hand.  
  
It was still early and Kenma hadn't eaten yet- but to be honest he wasn't very hungry. All the anxiety and stress of today was enough to make him feel sick to his stomach. He didn't even feel like playing his game. Ultimately, he decided to shower, get under his covers and go to sleep.  
  
That night, Kenma dreamt that he was falling. A hand had reached out to him but it was too late, he was already falling- and he just kept falling into a bottomless pit. He called out for help but it was futile. There was nothing around him, he was all alone and he was scared. That morning he awoke with a start. He was covered in sweat and his face was wet with tears.  
  
He roughly wiped at his eyes with his pyjama shirt sleeve. Shouyo, who mewled at his owner, was right by his side. Kenma scooped up the ginger in his arms, placing his head into the cat's stomach.  
"I don't know what's worse, Shouyo," He whimpered.  
  
"Falling forever, or actually hitting the ground when you stop."  
  
  
                                                ***  
  
Kenma trekked up the stairs of the science department. His destination was the forensic science class situated on the third floor.  
"Ugh, so many stairs…" he breathed, finally making it to level three. Kenma wasn't exactly the fittest person around so he was panting as he made his way into the classroom.  
  
"KENMA!' I was scared you weren't gonna show up today," called an obnoxious voice. Great, he's already pestering me, Kenma thought to himself as he let out a sigh. The obnoxious voice belonged to a tall man with chocolate-brown windswept hair, who was sporting some black skinny jeans and a white tank top adorned with a picture of an alien. He was standing by a bench a few meters from where Kenma was standing.  
  
"Oikawa-san, of course I would show up." Kenma retorted, rolling his neck from side to side.  
"It's not like I'd skip out on class just because the professor yelled at me yesterday for not paying attention, unlike someone I know." Oikawa flinched at that comment.  
  
"Come on Kenma, don't be like that," Oikawa whined. "It was ONE TIME." He pulled on the arm of the shorter man next to him. The man's arms were bulging out of his shirt sleeves. He had dark and short spiked hair and wore an irritated expression on his face, glaring in Oikawa's general direction.  
  
"Trashkawa, get off of me." He yelled while attempting to shake off the brunette. "And stop harassing Kozume, he's not petty like you."  
  
"Iwa-chan~" Oikawa continued to pull on Iwaizumi's arm, slightly shaking him with the sheer force he was using.  
  
"Why are you being mean to me? You're never this mean when we're alone." Oikawa pouted, teasing the shorter boy. Kenma could have sworn he saw Iwaizumi's face redden slightly but he dismissed it when Iwaizumi turned to him with a serious expression on his face.  
  
"Hey Kozume, you're looking kinda tired are you sure you've been eating right?" Kenma nodded in response although he hadn't eaten much more than a few pieces of apple for breakfast this morning, plus he hadn't eaten much yesterday, or the day before that even. He couldn't remember the last time he ate a proper meal, probably back when he lived at home with his parents.  
  
"Don't worry Iwaizumi-san, I'm fine. Just didn't sleep too well last night that's all."  
  
"Well, even if he hasn't eaten much he's probably fed up with your nagging, Iwa-chan~" Oikawa teased, laughing a little at his own joke. Iwaizumi wasn't too impressed by it and Kenma seemed to find that more amusing than the joke itself. The trio was interrupted by the professor entering the room and they each took their seats, Oikawa in the middle with Iwaizumi to his left and Kenma to his right.  
  
Kenma tried his best to pay attention in class, trying to keep the dream he had that night out of his mind. He wasn't able to fully concentrate on taking notes due to the growling of his stomach as well as Oikawa's constant whispering of  'Are you paying attention?'. Kenma ignored him, not wanting to get on his professor's nerves two days in a row.  
  
The professor may have shot a few annoyed glances at Oikawa but Kenma didn't think the brunette noticed- he was too busy looking at what the dark haired boy next to him was doing. Iwaizumi jabbed the other boy's stomach a few times with his elbow and muttered 'Pay attention, Trashkawa,' a couple of times too. Kenma couldn't help but smirk at the interaction between the two men.  
  
Classes finished at 4pm today and Kenma wasn't scheduled to come into work until tomorrow night so he was free for the rest of the day- free to play video games that is. Kenma's classmates farewelled him as they went on ahead down the stairs together. They seemed to be in a hurry too, were they late for something?  
  
At that moment he realised he had left his bag in the lab. He immediately went back to fetch it and was stopped by the professor.  
  
"Kozume-kun, you did well today ignoring that friend of yours," he patted Kenma's back, causing the boy to flinch slightly at the touch.  
  
"It doesn't take much to ignore him, Sir," he replied with a slight shake in his voice.  
  
The professor cleared his throat. "Well that doesn't seem to be the case for that Iwaizumi," he scoffed raising his eyebrow. Kenma laughed at that. He farewelled his professor before walking over to the staircase.  
  
Kenma slowly made his way down the deserted staircase. The dream that he had earlier resurfaced and the thought of falling down the stairs into a bottomless pit scared him stiff. His stomach lurched and Kenma felt his legs give out as he clambered down the last couple stairs.  
His chest was constricting and he started to pant uncontrollably, breathing becoming frantic.  
  
He couldn't feel anything  
  
Crouched down facing the wall, holding the support rail with one hand while the other hand clenched the fabric around his chest Kenma's sight was peppered with black and yellow spots. Tears streamed down his face as he tried to supply the oxygen his lungs were greedily demanding. Whilst shaking violently, the fragile pudding head sobbed uncontrollably. Whimpers escaping through his clenched teeth.  
  
This wasn't the first time Kenma had experienced an episode like this, it happened quite often back when he was in high school but it hadn't happened very recently. The sudden onset of the panic had left Kenma completely immobilised and embarrassed.  
  
"Shit, Kenma! Are you okay, what's wrong?" A voice called out, followed by frantic footsteps. The voice sounded distant like Kenma had his head underwater.  
  
"Hey look at me." chilled fingers reached under Kenma's chin turning his head up and to the right. He was now facing someone who was on the stair just above him, not that he could see them.  
  
"Kenma, it's me Kuroo. You're gonna be okay, got that?" The chilled fingers removed themselves from Kenma's chin and suddenly there was a warmth that spreading throughout him. Strong arms found their way around Kenma's shoulders pulling him into an embrace.  
  
It's warm.  
  
 Kenma could feel the shaking in his body cease slightly. A hand rested itself on his head, it played with his hair, patting and caressing, followed by soft 'shh shh's' and a warm breath on his neck.  
  
After about ten minutes Kenma had calmed down considerably. His vision had returned and he was breathing normally again. Kuroo didn't remove his arms from Kenma even once for those full ten minutes.  
  
There were others on the staircase now but Kenma was still a bit panicked to even notice the judgemental looks they were throwing at the him and Kuroo.  
  
All that mattered to Kenma in this moment were the strong arms wrapped around him and the soft murmurs of 'you're okay'.  
  
The two stayed like that until the small tremors in Kenma's limbs ceased completely.


	2. Don't Worry About Me, I'll Be Fine

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sooo, here we are with our first update!! Its almost been two weeks since chapter 1 but now we’re back with more hopefully not too poorly written Kuroken. Feedback would also be amazing I will personally give delicious wholesome baked electronic cookies to anyone who gives feedback

"Um, I think I should be okay now." Kenma sniffled. Kuroo's arms tightened around the fragile pudding-head in instinct. "That means let go, idiot," he growled shyly at the boy embracing him.

"Ohh-um, sorry!" He apologised, raising his hands in a 'don't shoot me' sort of pose. Kuroo pulled his jacket sleeve over his hand and used his thumb to wipe under Kenma's eyes cleaning away the remaining tears that the younger boy failed to notice until then. Kenma cursed his weak eyes. His eyes were red, puffy and were glossed over, he looked like he could break down again at any moment.

"You sure you're okay?" Kuroo asked with a worried expression as he helped the other to his shaking feet. 

Kenma nodded even though he knew he wasn't really okay. It was better for people to think that he was. He didn't want to be a burden.

Not to Kuroo. Not to anyone. Not ever again.

The two walked down the stairs in a heavy blanket of silence which was soon broken by the taller boy. 

"Um by the way if you were wondering why I'm here, I was actually on my way home from class. I-I I just don't want to you to feel like I'm following you like yesterday." Kuroo muttered the last part under his breath.

"You're studying science?" Kenma responded turning his head to look at the other with a dubious expression.

"Yep!" He relpied proudly. "You probably won't believe it but I'm currently studying the medical sciences, I'm gonna be the best doctor out there." The bedheaded boy grinned and threw a peace sign in Kenma's direction. The random outburst made Kenma snort.

"Sure you are," Kenma said sarcastically. "And I bet you'll diagnose your patients by stalking them rather than examining them.” 

"Hey! I already told you why I was following you," the offended man retaliated. "I was trying to give your charm back, I wasn't STALKING you." Kuroo looked genuinely upset at the accusation. Kenma laughed at the defeated look on Kuroo's face. 

"Haha, I was just kidding," he chuckled. "No need to get so upset, I'm sure you'd be a great doctor." A small smile found its way onto Kenma lips. Kuroo blushed slightly, scratching the back of his head at the endearing expression on the younger's face as he smile.

"Good to see you're feeling better now," Kuroo smiled back.

"Thanks," the smaller boy murmured. 

"Huh, what are you thanking me for?" The older boy stopped on the stairs, but Kenma kept walking.

"For helping me with the attack… I'm-I'm really grateful you know." 

Kuroo could have sworn the pale boy's ears were tinged with a touch of pink but didn't mention it to the other. Although he did think it was pretty enchanting. He picked up his pace to catch up with the other who was now at the bottom of the stairs.

"Want me to walk you home?" Kuroo inquired. 

"I'm fine, stop following me already."

"But what if you have another attack, Kenma?" Kuroo stood in front of the boy and grabbed him firmly by the shoulders. "What will you do then, huh?"

This is exactly what Kenma didn't want to happen. He'd become a burden. A burden to someone who he'd only just met even.

Kenma grabbed the hands on his shoulders and lifted them off.  
"It won't happen again, you don't have to worry about me," he stated pushing away, walking away from the other boy in the direction of his home.

"You don't know that Kenma!" Kuroo shouted, grabbing the boy by the shoulder again and spinning him around to face his own. He gripped Kenma's wrist in his hand making sure that the other couldn't shake him off again.

"Ow-w, you're hurting mm-e, stop." Kenma struggled trying to loosen the other boy's grip. But his grip only tightened.

"I said stop, KUROO!" 

The hand around his wrist had receded but the feeling of his hand remained. Had Kenma done something wrong again? He seemed to be pretty good at messing up, making others angry at himself. He felt small trembles return to his limbs. 

Why do I always mess up?

Kuroo looked at the trembling Kenma who now had the starting of tears forming in his eyes.

"I'm sorry. I didn't- I mean- I was just-" Kuroo stuttered looking genuinely shaken up about what he just did, his eyes wide with disbelief. "S-sorry, I have to go," he said shaking his head.  
"… Sorry…" He mumbled as he walked on ahead of Kenma. Golden eyes watched on shocked as the boy slowly disappeared down a side street.

Kenma looked at his wrist, he could still feel the heat from Kuroo's hands. What happened with Kuroo? What was that? Why did he do that all of a sudden? It was definitely my fault he got angry. 

I messed up again.

The change in Kuroo's behaviour was so sudden, it was like he had no control, but then again maybe that's just the type of guy he is.

Kenma was still shaking, his legs began to tingle again. His breathing became laboured and he began to gasp for air. Kenma crouched down to the pavement, curling in on himself and grasping at his chest. Before he knew it the black dots were back. 

Looks like he was right, it did happen again. 

At this moment in time he was alone. He had no one. 

He was scared.

"Hey, are you okay?" A woman approached Kenma, she was wearing a frilly pink dress and a straw hat. Kenma looked up at her with tear-clouded eyes. "Wait, Kenma-kun?!" The girl shouted, Kenma flinched, he recognised the voice, it belonged to Yachi from work.

"What do I do? You are not okay!" She yelled as she began to have a mini panic attack of her own flailing her arms about in the air. "Kenma-kun, tell me what I should do."

 

***

 

"I'm home," Kenma's small voice called into his empty house. Well his house wasn't completely empty, Shouyo came running to greet his owner who had now discarded his shoes in the entranceway. He mewled up at his owner, following him into the kitchen where fresh food and water were set out for him. His owner went straight to his room after that, so Shouyo followed, deeming Kenma more important than his food.

Kenma threw his bag into the corner and crawled straight into bed. He hid himself under the covers as if it would protect him from all his worries. His worries about the dream, about Kuroo and about his past. A dip in the mattress alerted Kenma to his furry friend's presence. Trembling, he pulled down his covers to allow the cat entry into his artificial armour.

"Shouyo, why is the world so terrifying?" He asked. The cat simply nuzzled his owner's face. The gesture was so simple yet it gave the boy so much reassurance. "I'm scared Shouyo, it hurts, maybe more than it should." 

Kenma laid there for a while, unmoving. The only sounds filling the room was a reverberating purr and the soft breathing of the boy under the covers. 

There was finally movement from underneath the blankets, Shouyo emerged from the blanket revealing the face of a sleeping boy. Kenma was exhausted. His body wasn't used to having panic attacks, let alone having two so soon after each other. He fell asleep without eating again, this seemed to be becoming a common occurrence. 

Shouyo gave the boy's forehead a final nudge before jumping off the bed and scurrying off to the kitchen to dig in to his food. 

 

***

 

It was dark again. Kenma couldn't see a thing but he felt like he was falling. Falling deeper and deeper into the darkness. The hand reached out for him again, it was closer this time. It always kept getting closer.It reached out until it grasped Kenma's wrist. He stopped falling and hung there in the darkness, the hand grasped loosely around his wrist. 

A sudden fear came over the hanging boy, what if the grip was too loose? Would he start falling again? Would he hit the bottom this time? Please don't drop me… I'm scared to fall…

The loose grip on his wrist ceased and he was falling again. The hand continued to reach out like it was still hoping to catch the falling boy. He'd fallen too far for the hand to reach. He was sinking into the darkness, the further he fell, the harder it was to breathe. It felt like someone was squeezing his lungs, the air just wouldn't get in. He gasped for breath grasping at his chest in a hope to force more air into his lungs.

Kenma jerked awake in a cold sweat. "It was just another dream," he said in an attempt to comfort himself. Although he told himself it was just a dream, it didn't stop the tears streaming down his face or the tightness in his chest. The dream seemed all too real.

He looked at the clock on his bedside table. It was only 4:30 in the morning. He could try and go back to sleep but he didn't want to chance having another nightmare. He decided that the best thing to do now would be to have a nice, long bath to refresh himself.

When he'd finished with his bath he wrapped his towel around his waist and stood in front of the mirror. He noted the bags under his eyes, the redness in his eyes and the slight protrusions where his cheek bones pressed to the surface of his skin. His cheek bones weren't that noticeable compared to the way his ribs poked through to the surface of his chest.

"I wonder when I got so fat," he thought to himself.

It was now 7am. Kenma didn't start classes until 9 but he felt like he'd be pushing himself if he was to go today. Maybe I'll just skip class today, he thought to himself. He could afford to skip school, but he still had to go to work at 4pm. He needed the money. The money that his so called parents were meant to help provide him with so he could survive. Kenma didn't have that many friends but he knew that none of them had to work to put food on to the table and pay the gas bill. 

Kenma headed back to his bedroom where he was greeted by Shouyo who'd sprawled across his bed. He was tired, but he didn't want to sleep. More like he was afraid to sleep, afraid to be stuck in that dream again. He decided against going back to bed and instead grabbed his bag from the corner and took his old battered PSP that he was given apparently from an old friend when he was young.

He snuggled up on the corner of his bed with his back against the wall. He was encased in the blankets the only things not covered were his hands and his face. He looked at the charm dangling from his handheld console. 

I wonder what the person that gave me this was like. I wish I could remember. Their name, their face, their voice, anything would be better than knowing nothing. Kenma shook his head, trying to shake away his wondering thoughts. 

He booted up his PSP and the menu of 'Dragon Quest' appeared. He selected load from the menu and resumed from the place he'd left it at the first time he’d met Kuroo.

 

***

 

Kenma's phone buzzed, he'd received a message. He was reluctant to check it, his phone was on his bedside table which was now too far away in Kenma's opinion. It buzzed again, and again.

"Fine, I'll answer you!" Kenma snapped at his phone, saving his game and retreating from his blanket armour once again.

The messages were from Oikawa, how he got his hands on Kenma's number is still a mystery.

Mummykawa :P : KENMAAA! Why aren't you at school?! 

Mummykawa :P : Is it because of the whole "not eating" thing that Iwa-chan mentioned yesterday?

Mummykawa :P : Oi, Kenma why won't you answer me?! Don't tell me you're passed out somewhere?! Σ(º ﾛ º๑)

Kenma: I'm fine, idiot. You're still in class at the moment aren't you? Won't you get yelled at again?

Mummykawa :P : THANK GOD KENMA, I THOUGHT I WAS GONNA HAVE TO SEND OUT A SEARCH PARTY TO FIND YOU!  
　｡・｡∧_∧｡・｡  
｡ﾟ 　( ﾟ´Д｀)　 ﾟ｡  
　 　o( U U  
　　　 'ｰ'ｰ'

Mummykawa :P: Oh, and don't you worry about me. Iwa-chan is distracting the professor with his charm.✩ ( • ̀ω•́ )b ✧

Mummykawa :P: Shit, I think the professor noticed! Make sure you email me your address so I can come visit you after school! 

Mummykawa :P: Bye byyyyye~ (๑><๑)۶

Kenma: I have work today so don't come, I'll be at school tomorrow.

Kenma really didn't like the idea of someone coming to his house, especially Oikawa but he emailed his address anyway (he was definitely going to regret this later).

It was now 1pm, 3 more hours until Kenma had be at work. Maybe I'll get something to eat, he thought to himself making his way out of his bedroom for only the second time today. He opened his fridge and pulled out the remaining apple slices that he hadn't eaten yesterday. There were four of them. He stared at the slices in front of him and then put them back in the fridge. 

He wasn't hungry after all.

 

***

 

"Kenma, you're early!" Called a familiar voice. A tall, lanky man with silver hair waved, motioning for Kenma to come over. He was standing behind the counter smiling at Kenma with his green, cat-like eyes. Kenma sighed and walked over to the excitable waving man.

"Lev, where's Yachi?" Kenma asked. 

"She's out the back with the manager, she said she had to talk to him about something." Lev patted him on the back, the touch making Kenma a little nervous. "Don't worry buddy, she'll notice you some day," he said as he gave Kenma a teasing wink.

Kenma looked up at him and rolled his eyes. "It's not like that, Lev. Stop harassing me and do your job."

Lev looked offended. "Hey!" He snapped. "I am doing my job…" He said, dropping his shoulders and slouching slightly. he looked at his watch before his shoulder's perked up again. "Well look at that, its 3:50 which means I only have another ten minutes before I can leave." He had an excited look on his face, the kind of look a child gets when he receives a new toy.

"Why do you look so excited?" Kenma questioned, raising an eyebrow. 

"Yaku-san's coming over today!" He replied, grinning from ear to ear. "He's been busy with college so I haven't seen him lately. This will be the first time we're meeting up since about two weeks ago." 

"Oh, well tell Yaku-san I said hi."

"Ah, Kozume-kun you're here," The manager said as he exited the store room acknowledging his presence. Kenma nodded and said a small greeting. "Lev you can leave now if you want, you're shift just ended," the manager added. Lev cheered and said his goodbyes to everyone, calling out to Yachi who still hadn't emerged from the back room yet.

"Kozume-kun, could I get you to stock up the shelves at the front of the store? They're looking a bit empty," the manager asked.

"Sure, I'll do it right away." Kenma answered. He was a good worker and always did what he was told without talking back. Of course that was only the case if his manager was the one that had asked him to do it. 

Kenma grabbed a stack of snacks from the store room to stock the shelves with. He carried them in a few baskets making sure he wouldn't have to make a second trip back to the storeroom. Although the multitude of snacks weren't very heavy, they still put a slight strain on Kenma's thin arms. As he stacked the snacks on the shelves he felt his head go fuzzy. He knocked one of his baskets over with his leg, scattering the snacks contained inside all over the convenience store floor. 

A small squeal came from the counter. "Kenma-kun! Are you okay?! The snacks are everywhere!" Yachi came running over to the distressed Kenma who was scrambling to return the snacks to the basket. She helped pick up the snacks as she spoke, "Kenma-kun, are you okay? I mean you've been looking a bit pale lately and you know," she lowered her voice into a whisper, "how you had an attack yesterday."

Please don't bring that up.

Kenma looked at her in disbelief. "That wouldn't affect my work Yachi-san, don't worry. I just feel a little lightheaded is all. And thanks for your help yesterday, your company really helped calm my nerves." He said.

Yachi put the snacks she'd collected into the basket and then flailed her arms in the air. "Kenma-kun! Being lightheaded is no good either!" She left Kenma and disappeared towards the counter. Seconds later she returned with the manager by her side.

"Kozume-kun, I think you should go home for today." The manager said sternly but the expression on his face was one filled with worry. "You look awfully pale but I wasn't going to say anything unless it affected your work, and it looks like it has. Luckily there were no customers in the store when you knocked over that basket."

"But Manager, I'm okay I can work just fine."

"No buts Kozume-kun, this is an order not from me as a boss, but from me as a friend. Go home and get some rest." 

Kenma lowered his head in disappointment. "Okay, I'll go." He started to leave the store when the manager called out to him.

"Make sure you get something to eat, I've noticed that you've been getting a little thin." 

Even the manager had noticed.

 

*** 

 

Kenma had been sent home from work after only ten minutes, had he really deteriorated that much that it was affecting his job? He walked home with a heavy head. He was a few streets from his house when suddenly his stomach began to ache. His arms and legs began to tingle and the heaviness in his head intensified. His ears were ringing, he couldn't concentrate. His eyes went blurry and then everything went black. 

He was back in that dream again. He was falling. Falling into the blackness. His body tensed up and he felt like throwing up, although he wouldn't have anything in his stomach to throw up anyway. He felt an excruciating pain in the back of his head, like he'd hit it on something. But how would he have hit it if he was still falling?

A male voice penetrated the darkness. It was slightly distorted by the ringing in Kenma's ears but the words were as clear as day. 

"Kenma! Oh my- SHIT! There's so much blood. FUCK! Kenma I'm so sorry, I should've held onto you tighter. F-FUCK! SOMEBODY CALL AN AMBULANCE!"

Kenma reached out towards the fading voice and the speed at which he was falling slowed almost to a stop. The distorted voice sounded oddly familiar but Kenma couldn't put his finger on where he'd heard it or who it belonged to.


	3. When You Told Me You’d Be Fine, You Lied Didn’t You?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m SO SORRY that this took SO LONG! It had been written for so long but I just didn’t have the time to edit it but I’ve finally gotten around to it. Hope it meets everyone’s expectations. 
> 
> Also this one is from Kuroo’s point of view so sorry if you guy’s wanted to know what happened to Kenma :’(

Kuroo leaned back in his chair and watched as the other students left the classroom. His lecture for the day had just finished and he could finally tell his bro what's been on his mind since yesterday.

"I'm such an IDIOT!" Kuroo bellowed throwing his head back and cradling it in his hands.

"What do you mean, Bro? You might be dumb but you're not an idiot," the man sitting next to him replied. He had spiked up silver hair with black streaks and round golden eyes giving him an uncanny resemblance to that of an owl.

"I don't wanna hear that coming from you, Bo," The black-haired male responded looking unimpressed by the other’s joke.

"Bro, give me details then I can decide whether or not you're an idiot," Bokuto replied waving his hands motioning for his friend to elaborate.

"I scared off Kenma…" Kuroo responded looking a little deflated and covered his face with his hands.

The silver haired boy's eyes widened as he raised an eyebrow in thought. "Wait, you mean THAT Kenma?!" He exclaimed. "The one you're always talking about?! The one that you've been following on your way home since the start of this year?!"

"I wasn't following him home, idiot!" Kuroo blushed slightly. "Thank god there is no one to hear you Bo, they'd think I was a stalker or something. I just go home the same way okay," he said trying to clear up the misunderstanding.

"Sure, sure Bro." Bokuto nodded. "You said you scared him away?"

"Yeah, what should I do?"

"Well you should probably apologise. You know what class he has right? Why not go do it now?"

"BO, THAT'S A GREAT IDEA!" Kuroo yelled as he pulled his friend into an embrace, squeezing him unbelievably tight. "You don't have great ideas very often but when you do I could swear you are a genius!"

"Wish me luck! I'm gonna give it my best shot," Kuroo exclaimed releasing his friend from his embrace and headed out the door towards the forensic science class.

"GOOD LUCK BRO! YOU CAN DO IT, I BELIEVE IN YOU!" Bokuto yelled after his friend, he paused and then yelled, “Wait! Are you calling me 

 

***

 

Kuroo arrived at Kenma's classroom, but he was nowhere to be seen. There were only two people in the classroom, two men. One was wearing a jacket with a ridiculous alien pattern on it and the other was a stern looking man with large arms that rivalled Kuroo's own. The two were awfully close to each other, talk about no personal space.

Kuroo was about to approach them to ask if they'd seen Kenma when suddenly the man with the alien jacket moved his face even closer to the other, grabbed the other's neck and pressed their lips together. The taller man slipped his tongue into the others mouth causing a grunt to escape from the shorter man's lips. The kiss intensified with both men turning their heads to the side for better access into the other's mouth. The shorter boy moved his hands down to the other boy’s hips and then to his ass, gripping firmly.

Kuroo had seen enough.

"Ahem!" He coughed. The shorter man moved faster than anything Kuroo had ever seen before. He removed his hands from the other's ass and pushed him away causing him to fall over. Kuroo snorted at the embarrassment of the shorter boy, his entire face was red and he was standing awkwardly like a teenager that had just been caught reading porn.

"IWA-CHAN THAT WAS SO MEAN WHY'D YOU PUSH ME!" Alien boy cried. He'd gotten up from the floor and was rubbing the part of his ass that he'd fallen on. "It was just getting good too…" He pouted.

"Trashkawa shut up," the other retorted covering his face in embarrassment.

"What do you want Bedhead?" Alien boy turned his attention from his 'friend' to Kuroo. He looked pretty pissed.

Kuroo gave him an apologetic smile. "Sorry to interrupt, um, I was just wondering if you knew where Kenma is."

"Kenma? You mean you're Kenma's friend?" The look of disbelief on Alien boy's face was obvious. "He's not feeling well, he didn't turn up today."

"Oh, I guess I'll just talk to him tomorrow then."

"If you're looking for Kozume you might find him at this convenience store," the shorter boy said as he showed Kuroo an address on his phone. "I'm Iwaizumi Hajime and that unreasonable guy," he said pointing to the other, "is Oikawa Tooru."

"Nice to meet you," Kuroo said bowing his head slightly. "I'm Kuroo."

"Kenma's never talked about you before, did you guys meet recently?" Oikawa asked looking suspicious of Kuroo.

"I guess you could say that," Kuroo replied with an awkward smile.

"Listen here Kuroo. If you hurt Kenma, I swear I will hunt you down and I will make you wish you'd never met him," Oikawa threatened.

I think I already have hurt him, but there's no way I'm telling this crazy alien guy that. He might actually kill me.

"You should probably get going now, if you're lucky you'll catch Kenma before his shift starts," the brunette smiled. His personality just did a 180-degree flip. The unexpected change in personality caught Kuroo by surprise making him stumble back slightly.

"T-thanks, I guess I'll be on my way then," the raven responded bowing nervously as he left the room. On his way out, he could have sworn he heard a 'Let's continue from where we left off, shall we Iwa-chan' and a muffled 'Shut up' but he chose to ignore it, he was probably better off not knowing whether he had actually heard it right 

 

***

 

Kuroo made his way into the small convenience store that Iwaizumi had mentioned to him. The shelves at the front were stocked full of snacks. They were apple pie flavoured biscuits, Kuroo couldn't resist the urge to buy some. He walked around the store a little looking around for Kenma but eventually found himself in front of a small blond girl standing behind the counter.

"Sir, may I process your order?" the girl asked politely.

"Sorry, here I'm just getting these," Kuroo replied, handing the snacks to the girl. She scanned the snacks and place them in a bag.

"That'll be $5.50 sir." Kuroo handed over the money. The girl proceeded to process the transaction and then handed Kuroo his change and his snacks. "Have a good day, sir," she bowed and then reached for the broom standing beside her.

"Wait, is Kenma working today?" Kuroo asked.

"Sorry, Kenma was just sent home. He wasn't feeling very well and the manager was worried and then there was also his attack yesterday." The blond was frantic. "Oh no I wasn't supposed to say anything about his attack. Ah! I did it again." The girl was practically freaking out at this point.

"Wait, you said Kenma had an attack, you mean like a panic attack?" Kuroo's attention was caught immediately and he was intent on getting an answer.

"Forget I said anything, please. Kenma told me not to tell anyone." The girl was begging with her hands pressed together in front of her face.

"Shit, I told him he was going to have another one," Kuroo muttered under his breath.

"Another one? Wait so you know about Kenma's condition?" The girl looked relieved and put down her hands. "Thank god, I didn't let it slip to someone that didn't know about it."

"How long ago did he leave?" Kuroo asked with a serious expression.

"Hmm, maybe about five minutes ago, if you leave now you could probably catch up with him."

"Thanks, uh,” Kuroo paused.

"Yachi, my names Yachi." The girl stated with a smile.

"Thanks, Yachi," He waved as he left the store in a hurry to catch up to Kenma.

 

***

 

The convenience store was on the route that Kuroo and Kenma normally take home from college, luckily for Kuroo this meant that he would just take the usual path home and he should run into Kenma eventually. He passed by rows and rows of shops and houses all familiar to him, but also unfamiliar. He'd never been to any of the shops on his way home but if he did, he would go to the shops that were closer to his home.

I wonder if Kenma is alright, that girl Yachi said he had another attack. Was that my fault too? Did I put too much stress on him? Wait does that mean that Yachi helped Kenma with his last attack. Did she snuggle up close to him to calm his nerves?!

Kuroo stopped dead in his tracks, "How dare she get close to Kenma like that! Only I'm allowed to calm his nerves like that, find your own way I've already taken this one!" He yelled at absolutely no one. The passers-by shot strange looks at Kuroo and some of them even began walking faster to avoid making eye contact.

The realisation of what he'd done made Kuroo redden slightly but other than that he was unaffected. 

I need to find Kenma, that's my top priority right now. I don't have time to be embarrassed!

Kuroo came to a corner where a large crowd had gathered. 

I wonder what that's all about? 

Kuroo made his way over to the crowd and forced his way through to the centre. There on the floor was Kenma.

"Kenma!" Kuroo called as he ran over to the unconscious boy. There were murmurs coming from the crowd and a lot of them began to disperse leaving just a small group of people that surrounded the two.

Shit! I knew you didn't mean it when you said you were fine.

Kuroo looked around at the remaining spectators. "Don't worry I know him, I'll take him home." Kuroo hung his shopping bag around his wrist and proceeded to lift Kenma and his bag off of the floor. He crouched down beside the unconscious boy and lifted his arms over his own back propping the boy's head onto his left shoulder. He then grasped the boy's upper thighs in his hands and stood up with him on his back.

The spectators disbanded creating a path for Kuroo to carry the boy through. He continued down the usual path but stopped when he arrived at the intersection that he always turned at (The one that Kenma had noticed he left at every time). 

Wait a second. I don't even know where this guy lives, how am I supposed to take him home? Shit, what do I do now. 

Kuroo pondered on this for a while, pacing back and forth with the sleeping boy on his back.

I guess there's only one choice. I'm gonna have to take him back to my place. 

The walk home was long but Kuroo's arms didn't hurt at all. Carrying Kenma around took little to no effort, the boy hardly weighed a thing. Kuroo noticed how thin Kenma's legs and arms were, his ribs slightly pressed into his back. Had Kenma been eating properly? There's no way he would be this thin if he was.

There's absolutely no way.

Kuroo noticed the warm breath against his ear. He noticed the rise and fall of Kenma's chest against his back. He noticed the small puddle that was forming on his shoulder and he noticed the small sobs coming from the boy on his back.

"Don't cry Kenma, please. It reminds me too much of that time," Kuroo whispered to the unconscious boy, knowing full well that he couldn't hear him. If only he could just pat Kenma's back and reassure him that everything would be fine.

Kenma stirred a little mumbling something that sounded like 'It hurts.' That made Kuroo's heart hurt a little. Kenma's body tensed up and he started to tremble. All Kuroo could do was whisper 'It's gonna be okay' over and over as he walked home as fast as he possibly could.

 

***

 

Kuroo finally arrived home. He had difficulty unlocking his door with one hand as his other hand was occupied with keeping Kenma on his back. Once he unlocked the door he took the boy inside with him.

"I'm home," Kuroo called. He lived alone with his cat Tobio who was nowhere to be seen. Tobio wasn't exactly the best with new people so he was probably just hiding. Kuroo removed his and Kenma's shoes at the entryway before heading to his bedroom.

He placed Kenma onto his bed and covered him with the blankets. He could have easily put Kenma on the couch to rest but he thought that it would be more comforting to sleep in a bed. Plus, Kuroo wasn't going to sleep anytime soon, he was too worried about Kenma.

He was just about to leave the sleeping boy when a hand grabbed onto his shirt sleeve. His grip was weak and could have easily been removed but Kuroo didn't feel like it so he just sat on the edge of the bed next to the sleeping boy. He just sat there with a smile on his face stroking Kenma's hair and whispering 'Everything is going to be just fine' and 'I'm here for you' every so often.

The sleeping boy hardly stirred, not once letting go of Kuroo's shirt. There was one thing that he did say in his sleep though, 'It's not your fault.'

I wonder what he's dreaming about, whatever it is it must be hurting him. He looks so sad. 

Kuroo noticed the slight crease in Kenma's brow and the small trembling of his lips and the droplets of tears that ran down his face. The sadness displayed on Kenma's face caused a pain in Kuroo's chest. He leaned over the boy and planted a kiss on his forehead.

"Everything will be okay, I'll make sure that I protect you properly this time."

Kuroo felt a tiredness come over him. He was so tempted to fall asleep beside the already sleeping boy but decided against it. It would surely scare Kenma to wake up next to someone he barely knew.

Kuroo decided to have a bath to waste some time until Kenma wakes up. He felt bad leaving Kenma alone but he decided it was better if he wasn't alone in a room with Kenma being as vulnerable as he was at the moment. He didn't know what he might end up doing.

Kuroo started the bath and went to fetch a towel. When he returned the bath was full so he removed his clothing and got into the bath. The water was warm on his body.

I can't believe Kenma is in my house right now. IN MY BED. What in hell was I thinking. But I couldn't just leave him there. What else was I supposed to do? 

Kuroo tried hard to convince himself he had made the right decision but it wasn't working.

He sighed as he sunk further into the tub. He blew bubbles that floated to the surface in front of his face. 

What should I do now? Just wait for him to wake up and then explain what happened? I guess there isn't much else I can do now anyway, I can't just throw him back out on the street.

Kuroo resurfaced and rested his head on the edge of the bath. "I'll just wait for him to wake up and then I'll explain everything and apologise to him."

**Author's Note:**

> Okay sooooooooo if anyone at all is interested in the continuation of this fic we have about 5 more chapters typed up already.  
> I swear the quality improves XD......have a good day <3


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